Friday, August 3, 2012

Do you have Baby Fever?

Baby Fever: When a girl starts feeling a strong desire to have a baby, possibly to the point of obsession. (UrbanDictionary)

Does this sound like you? No worries! You are just one of many women who feel this way. Sometimes you can't even help it - with all the babies in your life from family to friends to celerities! Its natural to feel the strong desire to want a baby. They're kinda cute, cuddly, entertaining....but so are puppies.
Recently, I came across a forum all about baby fever. The initiator felt very strongly about having a baby. She talked about the pros and cons about having a baby - making some good points a long the way. Her and her husband had been married for a few years but wanted to make sure they were in a comfortable, financially stable, life before creating a little one. She has that longing to hold a newborn baby, the smell, the soft skin....she had been struggling with the urge to toss her birth control and run to the bedroom with her husband for a week straight! lol
On the other side of things, if they decide to have a baby now they will have to adjust some things. For one, they live in a tiny 1 bedroom apartment and would have to move to something bigger - which means more money for rent or a mortgage. Secondly, she would lose approximately half her pay while on maternity leave. In Canada, we get up to a full year of paid Mat Leave but in the States the only get a few months. I'm very lucky to live in Canada or we would have waited to!
She also pointed out that they would lose their freedom. Her and her hubby wouldn't be able to go out for dinner any time they wanted or to party, etc. They would be limited to once a month, depending on whether they could find a babysitter. She seemed not ready to give that up just yet. Many people choose to focus on their career rather than family. Its a huge debate that I've read in many articles from Todays Parent to Macleans.

Now lets look at the other side of this. A baby can be the most rewarding for Mommy and Daddy! The feeling of getting pregnant, creating life and sharing that journey with your spouse is just amazing. Whether you have a great pregnancy or a difficult one - its your journey together. I was very fortunate to have an easy pregnancy so of course I would consider another baby in the near future. However, those who have struggled throughout their pregnancy may reconsider another one. Although it was easy for me, the birth was not. It was long - 24.5hrs long - and very painful (all back labour) Read my birth story here!
Regardless of this, I cannot explain the joy I've had being home with my baby girl. The first few months were great because it was my boyfriend and I doing it together. This allowed for a great and fast recovery since I could get my sleep in during the day when I needed it. It really did make a difference to plan ahead. We both agreed that having the baby in the winter would make things easier for us. My boyfriend could really have some time with her, learn to take care of her since this was his first and I could have those extra hands around the house to help with the dog, cleaning and of course baby. Take advantage of this if you can. It really does change the newborn experience.

I'm sure there are other pros and cons to a baby and I could sit here all day arguing them to point! Its a personal choice to have a baby and you never want to do it alone. Just be sure to chose a time thats right for both of you and plan ahead of time - you have 9mths to figure things out! Dont just talk about the delivery either. Talk about after that - to baptize or not? day care or stay home? split baby duties - who does what? Perhaps go as far as to talk about preschool, private school, or public. You need to plan ahead - its the only way to really enjoy your journey through motherhood. Its never to early (or late) to start an education fund either! The Canadian government has grants regardless of how much you contribute to a child(ren)'s  RESP! I also went as far to get Adriana a bank account as well. She will learn to manage money - something most parents don't bother to teach their children until their teens - or later!

When do you plan on having a child (or children)?
Have you chosen your career instead of a family? Share you reasons in the comments below!
If you're pregnant, have you discussed things beyond the delivery?

1 comment:

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