You're probably thinking I've clearly lost it now. But seriously, its a good sign! Separation anxiety happens when your baby is maturing. They have no realized exactly how important Mommy is to them and don't want to "lose" you. Have no fear because like I said - its only temporary - and there are ways to deal with it. Here are some examples:
Keep Your Goodbyes Short
Prolonging the inevitable is only harder on your little one. A simple good bye, smile, kiss, and you're off works well. If they cry when you walk away - you can look back with a smile and wave to reassure them. I don't suggest going back to them when they cry. This will actually make things worst for you and the babysitter for the moment. They will get over it before you know it. Perhaps it will take a small distraction of a favourite toy or game but it will just fine. Whatever emotions you have - deal with them after you leave. If your baby sees you worrisome then he/she will be the same way. Fake that smile until the door closes!
Body Language>Words
Brings me to this point - act as if its alright to be with the babysitter or caregiver. If Mommy is confident about it, then baby will be better with the idea. Babies really do pick up on signals more than one may think. I personally have seen this with Adriana and I'm pretty good at realizing my emotions/body language/thoughts/whatever and deal with them right away - She is always better after I do. If I'm having a bad day - I have to quickly get over it or deal with a cranky baby for the rest of the day! Once I'm over it, she lightens up and we have a good day!
Sneaking Around
If you think you can pull a fast one on your baby and sneak out before she realizes it....you're dead wrong. Babies are smarter than you think. When your cutie realizes your gone....watch out! He or she may bawl their eyes out but even more so - they lose trust in you as their parent. This will make things harder on you or Daddy when you reunite again. You want your baby to trust you and your judgement so don't let sneaking away ruin it. Say a quick goodbye - kiss - wave and gone.
These are just some suggestions that I have seen work with my own eyes. Everyone is different and every baby is different. Most of the articles on Baby Separation Anxiety talk about creating independence and building character. However, during these moments, its not about independence or character. Its about the maturing individual - your baby. Its a phase that every baby goes through and with a few tricks you, as the parent, can ease the transition to getting over it - fast. Make sure to introduce new (trusting) people into your baby's world. Have a Date night once a month in order to get a break as "Mommy" as well as teach your baby that going with trusted caregivers is okay!
Another great way to ease the transition is to play Peek-a-Boo with your baby as soon as possible - and keep playing it with them. This will teach them the concept of separation and reunion. My boyfriend and I constantly play "where's the baby" with a receiving blanket. We throw the blanket over her head and let her pull it off by herself all the while saying "Adriana? where are you?" until she can see us. She absolutely loves this game and even initiates by holding the blanket to her head then pulling it down and laughing.
We also have never just dropped her off and left. We make a point to take her out of the car seat or stroller and giving her a toy or letting her go to Gran/Grandad or Aunt/Uncle. Usually after about 5-10mins we will say our goodbyes and I make sure to say "See ya later hunny!" I hope this gives her some reassurance that she will indeed See me Later! So far...we've have no problems leaving her with people and I hope it stays this way!!
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