We Moved Downtown

This has been planned since the beginning of the year - to move into a condo together. We each set out our needs and then compared; most of them were the same! Back in March we started looking, reached out to a rental agent to double up on the search for the "perfect" condo. We knew we would like to move in June or July because that was close to when Patrick's current condo lease would be up. We had a (what we thought) was a generous budget that we could live comfortably and still travel.

That last part was the biggest factor for not renting a house. Not only did we only need 2bedrooms but we also didn't want to spend the extra few hundred and with no amenities. Condo life was what we were headed for.

We looked online for about 2 weeks, just casually browsing through every website I knew of including Kijiji. I came across this beautiful listing that literally had every single one of our check points and fell UNDER budget. The best part - it was in Patrick's current building on a higher floor. Is this for real? I had to jump on it so I sent him the listing and asked if he had a minute to call them because I was busy at work. Withing the next 30minutes Patrick called me and said "We have to go tonight...at 6pm" Deal!

Later that night after we viewed the condo, we sat down and filled out the paperwork. We were both filled with excitement when we left and didn't want to wait - it was a GREAT deal! It literally was the most ideal option for us as we were familiar with the building, area, etc. That was a Thursday, by Saturday we got the phone call that it was ours. I cried. He hugged me. We celebrated with dinner and wine, of course.

We spent the next few months packing up and planning the best way to tackle it - Patrick ended up having his knee surgery booked for the day we got the keys but it was necessary. I got this, no worries! We were able to start on a Wednesday to move any of the small stuff or things we could take apart easily to bring up in the elevator - Patrick was on the 12th floor, we moved to the 26th floor! That helped a HUGE amount. Friends moved most of it for me - at least the big stuff - while i tackled Adriana's room.

Over the last few months we took her shopping to pick out a few things that would make her room - HERS. She got a new bed, bedding, pillows, etc. (Thank you, IKEA, for your in expensive and uniquely designed furniture). Adriana loved making the big decisions for her room and she hadn't even seen it yet!

The plan is to spend all day today building her bed and preparing her room for when she comes tomorrow. Her dresser and toys will come on the weekend with her clothes but at least most of the decor will be done beforehand. I can't wait!! She has this fabulous view of City Hall and Celebration Square (corner windows). With such a fun room, I hope she enjoys her own space - I know we will enjoy ours on the other side of the apartment!

This is a huge step - Moving into a downtown condo with my boyfriend and Adriana. I didn't think I would ever get to this point in our life this fast. I held on to the hope that everything will work out; that my time will come to be where I've wanted to be for awhile. I believe that my ability to keep pushing forward no matter what is what got us here. I never gave up, not once. I refuse to let anything or anyone hold me back from what we deserve. We have our own space - shared with a very patient, caring and loving man. I can't wait for  the next big thing for us. We eventually want to buy a house in a few years time but for now renting is what's calling our name!

Mommy Fear, You are Not Alone

I am reminded this week of my early days (weeks and even months) as a new parent. The amount of questions going through my head would leave me with headaches at times, but I've made it this far! I can't say my headaches have gone away, but the amount of questions have become less frequent. 

What changed?

I started to believe more in myself, more in my ability to be the best darn mom I could be for Adriana. I realized that I needed to trust my intuition more often and curb my anxiety. I told myself " I got this!" several times and I believed it most of the time.

Of course there were tears along the way, they made me stronger. There were moments of anger, that made me strong too. Its all part of the process of learning to be a mom or dad for the first time. 

I had a few friends that were already Mommies (or Daddies) who I would reach out to for confirmation that I was doing it "right" <--the quotes are because there isn't really a right or a wrong way...everyone has their suggestions for raising kids. Everything from how to feed them to how to dress them. Hold your ground.

I am not like most Mommies - I am not one who constantly runs after her child like a maniac or yells.Yes you read that right - I don't yell. Whats the point? I am saving my breath for when she's older! Your child isn't the best listener to WHAT you say but rather HOW you say things. Adriana is a soft spoken child for the most part - we dont raise our voices to communicate. Even before she turned 2yrs old she knew what an inside voice was. Thats more than most adults!

I may take a more relaxed approached to parenting but Adriana is really good kid. Not that she doesn't have rules - she has plenty and she follows them. I step in when she doesnt but its nice when everyone around her is on the same page too. If she acts out and we're not around, we expect the adult to say something to her! There have been times she's acted out and someone else had to remind her about her behaviour. We don't play the game that if Mommy or Daddy isnt around she can do whatever she wants.

I have faith in Adriana's ability. I truly believe when she wants to something let her try first. If she can't then show her how andlet her practice. I think its important to be independent and most parents would think I'm crazy. I want her to learn....isn't that part of being a parent? Teaching her things when she wants to instead of forcing it later. Its really paying off considering she knows how to dress herself (although pulling the shirt over her head is a bit difficult still).

This post wasn't meant to suggest how toparent but rather teach you that everyone does it differently. Not everything has to be by the book. Do it your way -- you know your child best! You have to trust yourself and know that you're not alone. That second guessing will go away as time goes on. Trust yourself, you know how to care for someone because you took care of yourself for years.

When you're really stuck, don't be afraid to talkto someone. Try not to hold it all in because guaranteed someone else has been there already. 

Happy New Year

To My Readers:

           I wish you all the best in the New Year. This is a fresh start to truly make another year memorable. This is your time to shine, set new goals and achieve or even exceed those goals! Make your mark with no regrets.

I have made a point to set my goals a few months ago and work out the plan (in different scenarios) to achieve them. I am a well organized person but feel that there's always room for improvement. I want to make myself a reflection for my daughter by bettering my life and setting goals. She is my everything - two years ago I remember telling myself everything changes from now on. Slowly but surely it has.

2013 has brought some sad moments (I think of Leah all the time....) and more happy moments. I have grown as a person but even more as a mother. I realize the amount of love a child truly requires - even when Mommy is sick or exhausted or busy. Slow down, Mommy. My time with Adriana has been amazing. Most parents never want their child to grow up but I haven't missed a beat. It only gets better! I have some aspirations for her - not expectations. Adriana is a unique child who will clearly soar in life. She is full of energy and life (with a few toddler moments lol) I may have a biased opinion here...but she is one very smart child for her age. Her love for books, puzzles, and dolls makes her just like any other kid. But her ability to grasp concepts, words, things, etc is amazing. I hope Adriana continues on this path - we, as parents, will encourage her as much as we can.

It truly is a blessing to become a parent. There are women who are not able to have babies and end up having miracles - Georgie, I'm thinking of you. Its a beautiful and touching thing when you know that person always wanted the Mommy title; that person who would completely excel at being one too! I'm old fashioned when it comes to being a Mommy. I don't think its necessarily a duty but definitely something women should really consider. The modern world has made it more acceptable to women choosing to not have kids at all. I respect that - it must have taken a lot to make that decision and share it with your family or spouse. Essentially, its also the reason some relationships fail. Becoming a parent isn't the "norm" anymore - many couples are opting not to have children for various reasons.

I remember great words said to me a few times these past few month. Words that really opened my eyes to things and settled a piece of my mind. It was words that I probably had heard before but never meant anything. These words sit well with me and I think it should be 2014 's motto. I hope they carry great meaning with you and help you through the rough and the good that comes in a new year....
" I Wish You Enough " - LS